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Article about affair with married man:
After being single for years with no hope of meeting Mr. Right, she finally managed to get married to the love of her life. Now that she’s settled down and happier than she’s ever been in her life, she's passionate about sharing all the wisdom she's learned over the journey.
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Having an affair with a married man: 5 things you need to know. If you’re having an affair with a married man I know what you’re going through. I’ve been there myself. It’s exhilarating, it’s scary, it’s rejuvenating, it’s confusing. Sometimes I felt like I was exploring the coastline of a strange new frontier with nobody to guide me: after all, sleeping with a married man is wrong, right? What sort of roadmap could I really expect for doing something that’s generally considered fairly shameful and low-down? But it does happen. Having an affair with a married man is more common than you might think, in fact, 25 percent of married American men have had extramarital affairs. I don’t need a Ph. D. in advanced mathematics to know that’s a lot of married men. Of course, it takes another person who wants to go down the cheating path as well for it to happen. And when an affair does happen the overwhelming nature of the experience can lead to some unforeseen and emotionally devastating issues that come after the rush of the sex and personal connection. I know about the high highs and low lows. I also know how it feels to be ashamed. Because I was raised to be quite traditional and based on my own moral compass I often felt ashamed during my affair. Did I feel guilty at the time? Honestly, yes. I felt disgusted with myself. I felt like I was only good enough to get the leftovers of love left by another woman, and I justified our affair by saying she probably didn’t appreciate him enough and I was just providing the love he deserved. But what about the love I deserved? I’ve come to realize that I’d discarded that thought and developed a mentality of “take what I can get.” This attitude caused me untold amounts of pain and distanced me from my power and authenticity in so many harmful ways. Because I wasn’t owning myself and I wasn’t loving myself, but I was asking someone else to take ownership of me and love me. It just didn’t work. When you don’t love yourself you don’t believe you deserve love. I felt like a fraud and a low-life, despite the various times I really enjoyed the affair. But in retrospect I see it differently: as a process of living and learning. It wasn’t always pleasant, but I can’t say it wasn’t real. 1) Having an affair with a married man can be exciting but also frustrating and confusing. There’s a lot of heartache and suffering that all of us go through in love, but I hope by writing this I can help some of you understand the most important things about having an affair with a married man. I’m not here to moralize you or to tell you how you’re a bad person, but I’m also not here to say it’s great and you should do whatever you want. Instead, I’m just here to honestly give you my perspective as someone who had a two-year on-again-off-again fling with a married man. I want you to know what I honestly believe you should do if you’re in a situation where you’re having an affair with a married man that you hope will become more. If you’re stuck in that awkward in-between area where you don’t want to push, but the odd afternoons tangled up in bed also aren’t quite doing it for you anymore and you want more. First, I want you to know there is nothing wrong with what you want. Finding inner peace and laughing in the face of the chaos was one of the first ways that I started to dig myself out of the hole that my lust and my own feelings of incompleteness had led me down into. You must accept that you want more from the relationship and love yourself and acknowledge your need instead of pushing it down or trying to force yourself to be happy about a situation that’s no longer satisfying you. I know that’s how it was in my affair for a long time. I lived in denial, pretending that our times together were enough for me and that really becoming a couple was just a funny pipe dream not something I really wanted.
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